Timmy has to stay home though.

Well, here's a treat. Right after work today, we are taking a field trip to Madera, California. Madera. It is near Fresno. It is one of THOSE kind of drives. The kind where the getting up has to be REALLY early to drive there Sunday morning and I am just selecting turning it into a Fun Vacation. So, last night I packed up the car. Bought some snacks. And late this afternoon, me and the team will drive through the predicted thunderstorms to near Fresno. To the Super 8 Motel! This is sort of a luxury digs, not the normal Motel 6. We upgraded by 2.

I know. I am an anomaly in the dog agility world being a one day of trial go-er. I have a small business that is just a pain in the ass to leave on Saturdays. Can be a pain in the ass to ever leave it. It involves horses. And their people. And my control freak self. So while all of you pack up and drive to dog agility on Friday evening and spend a couple nights there, have 2 whole days (or, in the case of the mega trials, 4 whole days) to get your Q's and work out your bugs, I have one day. It's just how my dices roll.

Every so often I have orchestrated the mission that is taking a day off of work. And actually gone to a dog show on a Saturday. It was helpful to have an extra day, like 2 chances for Standard Q's! A day to work out the bugs that are the bar knocking and the zombies. Steeplechase! This is the big reason I orchestrate the mission, because Steeplechase is always on Saturday and how would I do Steeplechase otherwise? Or DAM team? Do you see the problems I wrestle with in my life? I am like the only person with no ADCh. Which now will be a Performance ADCh. Someday. Since we had to start over with Performance Q's and Still No Super Q's. Whine. Like when I was a kid and I was the ONLY girl with the Hot Wheels lunchbox. I KNOW I picked it out, Mom. It's the one I Had To Have. It is my own consequences and I should just shut up now.

And, on the shiney side, with multiple dogs, multiple days of dog showing every month would be really, ouch. The entries. The motel. Lots of you sleep in your cars, I know. And work full time at the trial doing hard jobs. I am not a car sleeper. Or a good and cheerful all day worker. More of gate person/pole setter for some lunch worker. I am more like the discount shopper of the dog agility. Working to make money on Saturday, instead of spending more money at the dog show and losing money at work, even my bonehead accounting skills can work out that one. So one day-er I am. And usually not a motel-er, but for Madera, I'm making the splurge. Fun! Vacation! Motel!

I will have Illinois to think about driving out there. Do you like Sufjan Stevens? He is making a cd of each of our nation's 50 states. I just put Illinoise in my ipod. It is sort of like Simon and Garfunkel if they had a giant marching band and orchestra and made a film score for a movie that was about history and maybe quasi religious butterflies. I think that is super suitable for driving to near Fresno in the rain on Saturday after work with 3 small dogs.

I've got some good news and some bad news.

Hello and welcome back from Turlock, February USDAA.


Do you want to hear the good news or the bad news first?


It was that kind of day.


The good news is, look at this birdhouse I bought from an old lady selling them in front of her house on one of the highways in Turlock. It's the stable. Her disabled husband who ignores you through their front picture window builds them. There are apartments for 4 birds on the other side. I love my new birdhouse.

The bad news was, a huge rain storm came in Saturday evening and I almost just bagged the whole dog show and just didn't go. Had no inkling to drive to Turlock in the rain at night and hang out in the rain all day.

The good news is, I saved a Motel 6 bill and had less of a glamorous evening than previously planned. I watched some episodes of Big Love, slept in my own bed, and drove out to the dog show at 4:30 in the morning instead. And I took a new way to get there which was faster, more scenic, and easier roads to drive.

The good news is, Otterpop finally got that elusive Advanced Gamblers Q that she's been trying to get for, um, a really long time. Because she's been in Masters for a while. In everything except Gamblers.

The bad news was, she was still paranoid about judges near her and did that whole looking over her shoulder for machetes whilst running over contact equipment with judges nearby. They just want to see you step in the yellow Otterpop. That's it. But she thinks the first time she looks away from there and just where she's going, out comes machete.

The good news was, her teeters were exempt from machete watching and the paranoia did not result in any barking attacks.

The bad news was, she ran kinda pokey in Jumpers and this made me so sad.

The good news was, she was pretty fast in Standard but had a refusal and got a 2nd in her Grand Prix with a decent but not outstanding time. She was super fast once past the dog walk and a-frame where the judge was closely watching the contacts.

The good news is, Ruby seems perky and happy to play let's attack all the couch pillows with 3 sets of small dog teeth now that we are home.

The bad news was, she had a terrible Standard and I pulled her out of Grand Prix after half a course, and the rest of the day she walked like she was 100 years old and wouldn't jump in or out of the car. I scratched all the rest of her classes and still have NO idea what is wrong with her. If it's in her mind, if she's actually sore somewhere, or it's both. And just now, she wouldn't jump out of a chair to get a treat with everyone else.

The good news is, Hobbes had a beautiful Standard run with a stunning table.

The bad news was, he knocked a bar in it and didn't get the LAST Q for his LAA Platinum, the highest thing you can get in USDAA agility. So we didn't get to drink the champagne I brought for just in case.

The good news is, I tried to see if I could just haul ass with him as fast as I could in the Steeplechase finals and not get him to knock any bars. And I am having a momosa right now.

The bad news was, he hit a bar in Steeplechase (and I just blew him by his a-frame contact) and bars with Rob in other stuff and he is sore and that is probably why he is knocking all these bars. Maybe. So he got scratched from all the rest of his runs.

The good news is, Mary and Michelle from our dirt night classes ran in their first USDAA trial and did smashing. I saw with my own bloodshot eyes. And Mary was even wearing her Team Small Dog Shirt! And it did not rain and was actually a lovely day. And it was a nice crowd and all my dog agility friends were there and no one was in a mean mood. And Gustavo got to play a lot and was perfectly happy to sit in the car. I met Ellen who has the Taj Mutthall Agility Blog. (our blogs are of a very different nature, we agreed.) There. That's a lot of good news. Even though, all in all, it was a little bit of a crappy day dog wise, I am being very glass half full. Gonna fill it up again right now with momosa. Will bring a fresh bottle to Madera for just in case.

It is sort of like a vacation, but in a bad way.

This weekend, we are going to Santa Rosa. We have to be there about 7am on Saturday morning. Which means, we get to leave my house in the dark at 4:30am on Saturday morning! And that night, we are staying at Motel 6 in Santa Rosa! This is going to be one swell weekend!

Why? Of course it's for a dog show. Why else do we venture further than Watsonville ever? Why do people give me weird looks when I tell them about these dog shows? You are giving me one right now. I see it. I see that chuckle and shake of your head and I know exactly what it means. That Laura. She is so wacky about these dog shows. Except for yours, dog agility person. You are nodding your head, thinking, yes, at least she doesn't have to drive all night and it's not in LA. Or Santa Barbara. Or Arizona. Santa Rosa? That's nuthin.

And, take THAT dog agility friend, mine is in a covered arena! So just in case it is raining, it will be dry and icey cold at my dog show. With floating dirt particles in the air and nowhere for a dog to stretch out in the sun or the grass.

This one is special, it's for Tournaments and DAM teams only. DAM team stands for dog agility masters. That would be Otterpop and Ruby, damn masters of agility. They are on teams, and if they screw up, their team members will come after me with sharp stakes and rakes and possibly kill me. Can you give my dogs a ride home if I'm dead? If we win, they possibly we will have our Team Q, which is a requirement to get the ADCh. If we got enough points. Yes, I am getting up at 4am to drive to a freezing cold covered arena for 2 days, canceling a day at work, to possibly get a requirement that helps me earn some letters!

You know how much I like to get paid to do stuff. Everyone assumes I must be getting paid to do this. Ah, I see you dog agility person, nodding your head and chuckling, that would be nice but it is a funny joke! Instead of paying so much money, someone would pay me some money. That is a funny joke to laugh at! I know, non dog agility person right now, you are scratching your head thinking, but Laura likes to get paid the money to buy things like ranches! Perhaps, just last night, she had to stay up late graphic designing something really, really stupid because someone said they would pay her some money! She has to ride those horses and teach those girls to ride 'em to get some money. But she pays money to show the dogs? What about when she won the big Steeplechase?

That's what I'm saying. Enough of that.